Monday, May 02, 2011

Satire: Bin Laden Not Actually Dead

The President of the United States has apologised this morning after a poorly-printed press release caused him to announce the death of an Al-Qaeda figurehead this morning.

Journalists were briefed earlier that "We have killed Osama", when in fact the script read "We have killed Shola Ama".

Ama, 31, was best known for her 1997 cover of the love song "You Might Need Somebody", but hid away in the Iraqi desert after more recent follow-up songs flopped, reaching only number 641 in the charts.

Bin Laden's whereabouts, however, are still unknown. President Barack Obama has reiterated that the country "still does not know Osama's exact location", but added that "he could be anywhere", urging American citizens to check inside coffee pots, under rugs, and on top of fridges, as he could be hiding in any of these places.

More on this story as we get it.

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